Wednesday, October 26, 2016

Putting up the storm windows

The Husband recruited Elder Son to help put up the storm windows this year.

Me:  I feel better when there are two of you out there working with those heavy windows.

He:  Only one of us can go up the ladder, you know.

Me:  I know.  It just makes me feel better that you have help.

He:  Hey, the first ten years we lived here, I did it all by myself!

Me:  Then first ten years we lived here, the guy who went up the ladder was 40-something.

Yes, a good burn.
But I helped wash the windows because I felt so bad.

Thursday, October 20, 2016

Just angry. You don't have to read this.

It is 5:40am.  I am fπcking p!sssed at the world, but I'm too fπcking tired to make it interesting.

A bad customer service encounter yesterday started it. The inability to do a damned thing about it perpetuated it. Being woken up unnecessarily at 3 fπcking 30 in the morning is infuriating.
Today is a special day I'm allowed to sleep in, but I can't fall back asleep because I'm so angry.

I hope you have an okay day.
Mine hasn't even started and it's already fπcked.

Monday, October 17, 2016

Meat Counter

While the Husband and I were shopping at the natural foods store, he took special interest in the meat display.   He picked up a package of something, showed it to me, and said something along the lines of, "Look at this."

A voice behind us said, "All the beef products are excellent!"

I turned to find a male employee behind the produce counter arranging fresh greens into small plastic cups for sampling.

When we made eye contact, the employee continued, "The chicken is really good, too."

The longer we stood by the meat display, the more the employee offered remarks about the high quality of the meat selection.

With a wink to the employee, I said to the Husband, "I don't know how much faith we should put in the opinion of the man making the tiny salads."

"These are good, too!"


Monday, October 10, 2016

Is not! Is too!

When you go to your boss and tell him that problem with the accounting system the two of you share happened again today, and he looks you straight in the eye and says, "Yeah, I think we've finally gotta past that problem."

When you tell him TODAY the problem happened again.
And he tells you it's fixed.
But you're standing in front of him TODAY telling him there's a problem.
But he says yeah, good thing it won't happen anymore.

It's his company.
So I just shut my face.

Tuesday, September 27, 2016

What I Learned About Turning 50 (part 1)

Hey, here's something I didn't know before I turned 50.
Once a woman turns 50 years old, her doctor can't prescribe birth control pills anymore*.

That's right, sisters.  At 50, you have to choose an alternate form of birth control because you can't take The Pill anymore.

This comes as a complete surprise to me.
You would think that since I had been asking my doctor about changing my birth control every year since I turned 40 that perhaps I'd have known this little bit of knowledge before last week.  But I didn't.  Because he told me there was no reason to change a thing.  In fact, he might have said something like, "We'll have a discussion when you're 50."

That was my warning.
He didn't tell me we'll talk about it because I can't have birth control pills after 50.  That would have been useful.

During my annual checkup last week, he didn't come right out and say that I couldn't have The Pill.
No.  He started out talking about how alternate birth control methods could make menopause easier to deal with.  He spent a lot of my short office visit talking about surgical options and other methods that he didn't like and hoped I wouldn't want. 
A lot of time.
Finally, I asked, "Well, what if I just stay on the Pill until menopause is over?"
And THAT'S when he finally told me he couldn't prescribe it any more.

I tell you this so if you are not yet 50, you can start to have a more meaningful conversation with your doctor about your birth control choices before one of them is taken away from you.

*I'm not the world's best Googler, so I had trouble finding a credible source to back up my doctor's claim that he "can't" prescribe oral contraception to me.  However, the closest I could come to such a claim was an article stating that birth control pills can safely be used until the age of 50; but it didn't say woman can't take it after turning 50.

Thursday, September 15, 2016

The One with the Tiara

"So.  What's with the tiara?" the Husband asked cautiously.

"It's my birthday.  And I wanted one. So I got one."

The Husband turned to Elder Son.  "Your mother has lost it."

Elder Son watched silently as I slowly touched the sparkly wand to my head.  He said, "I see nothing out of the ordinary."

"I'm a princess!  My son treats me like royalty!"

Elder Son gave me a hug and left the room.

I told The Husband, "I'm his Fairy Oh-My-Godmother. "

I'm 50 today.
I'm seriously considering wearing the tiara to classes at the university this morning.

Thursday, September 08, 2016

Sure Happy It's Thursday

He: I can't believe it's already Thursday.

Me: I can't believe it's not butter.

(Gimmee a holla if that's what ran through your head, too.)

Monday, September 05, 2016

An AckThbbbt Labor Day

How awesome is it that The Husband and Elder Son are both working today?
It is super awesome!


Both of them are headed toward the same Labor Day event to cover it for their separate media companies.
The Husband is recording it from behind a microphone.
Elder Son is recording it from behind a video camera.

How cool it that?
THAT is totally freaking cool, is what that is.

Thursday, August 11, 2016

Hours of Ours


Elder Son (who works part-time): I've already put my 20 hours this week!

The Husband (who works full-time and then some): Gee, how many hours have *I* worked this week already?

Me: Pft! I work 40 hours every week, then I come home and whine about for another TEN hours, you quitters.

Tuesday, August 02, 2016

Early on a Workday

Me waking up a full hour before my alarm goes off:  I don't think I'm going to like anything today.

And then I didn't.